For the Moms Who Taught Us Without a Recipe

She Never Wrote It Down

There was no recipe card. No cookbook open on the counter. No Google. If you wanted to learn how to cook in a Haitian household, you watched. You stood close, you paid attention, and eventually — if you were lucky — she'd let you stir.

That's how most of us learned. That's how our mothers learned, and their mothers before them. Cooking wasn't something you read about. It was something that lived in your hands.

My grandmother's kitchen was the kind of place where everything happened by feel. A handful of this. Enough of that. The rice was always perfect. The beans were always rich. The chicken — simple, pulled, sauced — was the kind of thing that made you close your eyes on the first bite. I never once saw her measure anything.

Haitian Moms: A Different Kind of Strong

If you know a Haitian mother, you know. They work harder than anyone around them — and they do it quietly, without asking for recognition. They give everything, including their last. They uplift the people around them even when they're running on empty. They are tough in the way that only comes from carrying a lot, and loving in the way that makes you feel like the most important person in the room.

Faith holds them. Family is everything. And somehow, through all of it, there is always food on the table.

Many of us grew up celebrating both Haitian Mother's Day — the last Sunday of May — and the American one earlier in the month. Two celebrations felt right. One day was never enough.

🍚 Grandma's Rice & Beans with Pulled Chicken and Sauce

Serves 4–6 | This is a feel recipe. Trust yourself.

Ingredients

For the Rice & Beans (Diri ak Pwa):

• 2 cups long grain white rice
• 1 can red kidney beans (or dried, soaked overnight)
• 3 cups water or chicken broth
• 3 cloves garlic, minced
• ½ small onion, diced
• 2 tbsp oil
• 1 sprig fresh thyme
• 1 whole Scotch bonnet pepper (do not pierce)
• Salt to taste

For the Pulled Chicken & Sauce:

• 2–3 lbs bone-in chicken pieces (thighs and drumsticks work best)
• ½ cup epis (blended garlic, onion, bell pepper, parsley, scallion, olive oil, lime)
• Juice of 1 lime or sour orange
• 1 tsp salt, 1 tsp black pepper, 1 tsp dried thyme
• 2 tbsp tomato paste
• ½ onion, sliced
• 1 cup chicken broth or water
• 2 tbsp oil
• Fresh parsley to finish

Instructions

The Rice & Beans:

1. Heat oil in a heavy pot over medium heat. Add garlic and onion, cook until soft and fragrant, about 3 minutes.
2. Add the beans with their liquid (or drained if using dried). Stir in thyme, Scotch bonnet, and salt. Let it simmer for 10 minutes so the beans absorb the seasoning.
3. Add rice and stir to coat. Pour in water or broth — the liquid should sit about an inch above the rice. Bring to a boil.
4. Reduce heat to low, cover tightly, and cook for 20–25 minutes. Don't lift the lid. When the liquid is absorbed and the rice is tender, it's done. Remove the Scotch bonnet before serving.

The Pulled Chicken & Sauce:

1. Marinate chicken in epis, citrus juice, salt, pepper, and thyme for at least 1 hour — overnight is better.
2. Heat oil in a wide pan over medium-high. Brown the chicken on all sides, about 4–5 minutes per side. Don't rush the color — that's flavor.
3. Add tomato paste and sliced onion, stir to coat. Pour in broth, reduce heat, cover and simmer for 30–35 minutes until the chicken is cooked through and falling off the bone.
4. Pull the chicken off the bone with two forks and return it to the sauce. Let it simmer uncovered for another 5–10 minutes until the sauce thickens. Finish with fresh parsley.

Serve:

Spoon the rice and beans onto the plate, pile the pulled chicken and sauce right on top or alongside. That's it. That's the whole meal. Simple, honest, and exactly right.

A Note on Measuring

My grandmother never used measuring cups. If yours didn't either, trust that. Cooking this way — by taste, by smell, by the sound of the pot — is a skill. It was taught to you even if you didn't realize it at the time. The measurements above are a guide, not a rule.

To every Haitian mother and grandmother who fed a family on faith, love, and whatever was in the kitchen — this one's for you. Bonne Fête des Mères. 🤍🇭🇹